‘Those who walk alone are likely to find themselves in places no one has ever been before.’
(Unknown)
Seven
Days Alone in the Drakensberg
(And
Other Poor Life Choices)
Because
the mountains don’t care… but they will kill you politely.
Day One:
I set off like every overconfident hiker in history: hydrated, motivated, and
utterly convinced the mountain would admire my fitness and reward me with seven
smooth days.
The mountain responded by greeting me with a climb so steep I nearly met Jesus
before lunchtime.
Lesson #1: The Berg doesn’t care about your gym selfie strength. It cares
about your quads. Deeply. Personally. Violently.
Day Two:
Fog rolled in — the thick “you-may-or-may-not-be-walking-off-a-cliff” type.
I checked my GPS every 12 seconds like a nervous squirrel. At one point I
thought I heard bells… turned out it was just my heartbeat panicking.
Lesson #2: Visibility can go from HD to Nokia-3310 in four minutes. Carry a
map, compass, and brain.
Day Three:
I explored a river that looked calm and innocent — like a toddler holding
scissors.
Slipped once. Slipped twice. Nearly baptised myself the third time.
Lesson #3: Wet rocks are the devil’s dice. Step carefully or start
practicing your mermaid skills.
Day Four:
Wind. Not normal wind.
Biblical wind.
Wind that tried to unzip my tent from sheer disrespect.
Wind that made me rethink all my life choices, including the sandwich I packed.
Lesson #4: If you hear the wind whisper “are you sure?” the answer is NO.
Pitch low. Anchor everything. Including your ego.
Day Five:
Saw baboons.
They saw me.
We exchanged a long, meaningful stare across the valley where both sides
understood:
they could steal my food, my dignity, and probably win in a fight.
Lesson #5: Wildlife is not Disney. They don’t sing. They plot. Protect your
snacks.
Day Six:
By now my legs were on strike.
I was fuelled entirely by dried fruit, rage, and the promise of a hot shower.
Then — a cliff edge appeared out of nowhere. The world just stopped. Boom. No
more ground.
I stopped so fast I nearly left my soul behind me.
Lesson #6: The Berg has unmarked edges, unmarked drops, and zero sympathy
for daydreamers. Stay focused.
Day Seven:
The final descent… glorious… triumphant… emotional…
Until I misjudged one small step and nearly rolled down the hill like a
possessed cheese wheel.
Saved myself with a move that can only be described as “panicked yoga.”
Lesson
#7: You’re not down until you’re down. The Berg will
take you out in the last 400 metres just for the punchline.
Final Wisdom (The Hard Truth):
The
mountains are funny.
The mountains are beautiful.
The mountains are healing.
But the mountains will ruin your day if you arrive with arrogance instead of
preparation.
Go prepared.
Go humble.
Go with a plan.
And for the love of all things holy — tie down your tent.
We as hikers, explorers, and
adventurers have the absolute duty to respect and protect our Wildernesses.
Nobody else will do it for us. Take ownership!
The End.
Safe Hiking.
References and Acknowledgements
Photos – Willem Pelser
Written and Compiled by Willem Pelser
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